Have any of you seen this movie? I haven’t, because it is a chick movie! And chick movies don’t go down too well with
The Bear. When The Bear is comfy in his
cave (lying on his couch), tea and ciggies at the ready – the LAST thing he
wants to view is chicks crying or talking about sex. So how about this for an idea? How about injecting some violence into chick
movies? Just take the following scene
from an average chick movie. The
dickhead guy has just broken her heart by sleeping with a) her best friend or
b) some hot model he could never pull in real life. Our heroine is sobbing her heart out, chucks
him out on his ear and calls up her besties to rescue her. BUT, what if instead, she pulls out a 9mm and
pops a few into his miserable chest OR better yet, a karate kick or two to the
gonads! Then she calls her besties to
help her clean up the blood. That is a
chick movie The Bear can get into.
But now, I wonder sometimes how I do it! Let’s look at what
I do from the time I get up to the time I drag the kids out the door: 5am to
6:30am
5am: The alarm goes off and I get up; bathroom, switch
burglar alarm off, let dog out, put kettle on; wash face, make 1 coffee 2
sugars (The Bear), 1 tea in a teacup with 2 sugars (Fluffy) and 1 tea in a mug
with sweetener (Me); deliver before mentioned beverages with a smile to
sleeping partner and child; look in on the Love Puppy who is already beginning
to stir, being a morning person like his Mom; organize chronic meds for The Bear
and I; take meds drink tea; put on face cream; get dressed; Love Puppy boy is
up and dressed at this point – ALL BY HIMSELF and he is ONLY 7; Love Puppy
requests a chore – he is saving up for a Nintendo DS; I assign him to empty the
dishwasher for R5 (A fully five rand Mom – that what he calls a five rand
coin); While the Pup is busy I finish putting on my shoes; Then I go wake up
Fluffy again and ask her to drink her tea; Then I wake up Bear and tell him
where his coffee and meds are; Then I put together the kids lunches while I eat
breakfast and lay out the Pup’s breakfast; Fluffy doesn’t eat breakfast – she
doesn’t have time as you will see later; I yell at Fluffy to drink her tea and
hear snoring from the Bear. I give him a
time check, “I’m getting up right now” is what he says; While finishing my
breakfast and the kids lunches, Pup asks me to play rummy – of course I can’t
say no since he is up and ready and looking all sweet without his two front
teeth; So now I am making kids lunches, playing rummy; eating special-K; trying
to get Fluffy to drink her tea and trying to get Bear up – Pup wins the first
hand; Then I get started on our lunches; I yell at Fluffy, “Drink your
tea!” She yells back, “Tell me when its
10 minutes to go!” More snores are heard from the main bedroom; “Darling, its
6:15”, “What!” he exclaims as he turns over to hug his pillow; “ I’m packing
the car Fluffy” I yell. “What!” she says as she scrambles out of bed, “You
NEVER wake me on time, now I’m late and it’s ALL YOUR FAULT!” she yells. “Don’t
be rude to your Mother!” The Bear contributes from under his warm duvet. As I
pack the car with all the kids stuff, Princess Fluffy starts crying, “Help
me! My skirts too tight and I don’t know
where Mr. Bunny is!”; quickly I find her another skirt and Mr. Bunny is found
hiding under the pillow; “We are GOING!” I yell loudly. I go in to kiss The
Bear good-bye. He is having his coffee
now “See you at work” he mumbles. The
Pup and I are already in the car when Fluffy flies out the door in a huff! All ready????
Let’s go!
Now that was just from 5:00 to 6:30…. No wonder I prefer it
at work ;-)
Pic of the happy trio below!