SARS - a four letter word?

So its that time of the year again, year end for most companies and the battles start with the so- called e@sy file system.  But, this year I have another beef with the most efficient government department in South Africa.  I am, as a VERY loyal taxpayer, desparately trying to get a Tax Clearance certificate.  On the face of it, the procedure is simple.  Just log on to your e-filing profile and apply. 3 to 5 working days later, you receive a notification in your inbox that your certificate has been granted.  All smiles, you set off at the crack of dawn to your local office, pitch a tent, and wait the 5 hours in the que to get in.  Wait another 5 inside the building and "hey presto" you receive your shiny new Tax Clearance certificate.  A spring in your step, you return to your office, humming a catchy tune confident that your tax Rand is being well spent.

In reality..... I have applied about 10 times in the last 4 months and this is how it has worked.  I apply online and get my stinky "application denied" email in my inbox about 10 days later.  So far so good - all efficient.  I then phone up SARS to try to figure out what went wrong.  I am given an answer, for example, you owe 50 cents on your VAT interest from 1929!  So I ask the fatal question - "Is there ANYTHING else outstanding"  and receive an assured "NO"  So like a good citizen I settle my 50 cents and start all over again only to be rejected AGAIN. Now the problem is that they don't have my IRP 5s from 15 years ago and want them electronically submitted.  Forget that this is 15 years ago and we were all writing them out by hand.  So off to the cop-shop, sign an affidavit, submit same to SARS, wait a while, then reapply and....  REJECTED.  Why?  My 2000 SDL returns are outstanding???  WTF people!!!  How can returns from 12 years ago be outstanding and now I only hear about them?  What about the first 10 times I applied and was rejected?  Rant, rant, RANT RANT RANT!!!!

And this, my fellow South Africans, IS the most efficient government department.  Don't believe me?  Just try to phone up the WCA.  Make sure you have facebook open at the same time because it takes them 50 minutes to answer the phone.

So - my solution?  We have many people out of work - employ them to answer the frikkin phone and update the SARS system.

So my rant for the day is done.  Love you all
xxxxxx

Starting a blog about nothing and everything

Why start a blog and about what?  Well, the answer is that embarrassingly enough, I have ambitions to write a novel and this is my way of starting. Yes, I am one of the many thousands of Moms out there who think my life experience is worth a million Rand book deal! After all, Jodi Picoult is a Mom and so is whats her name of the vampire-teenage-werewolf series. Surely my experience as a Jewish Mom recovering from a serious drug addiction is worth SOME read worthy paragraphs?

So now I must introduce the dramatis personae in my house, in the Northern Suburbs of Cape Town.  First of all, there is "The Bear".  The Bear is the love of my romantic life.  He is called The Bear because he kinda looks like a bear, he is very strong, very cuddly and often smells like a bear.  Yup, he is often "too tired" to shower and shave, but miraculously has energy for activities like watching 5 episodes of Criminal Minds.  How I ended up with this adorable caveman, I don't know.  My ex-husband showers practically hourly and is always armed with hand sanitiser.  You could eat off the man's bum! (not that I have ever tried it)

Then there is Princess Fluffy, the ten-ager - no that is not a spelling mistake.  She is not technically a teenager, being only ten years of age, but she more than makes up for it in hormonal swings and crying-shouting spells, followed by sullen apologies. She is also gorgeous, charismatic and looks like an angel when she is sleeping.  In fact, every morning before I wake her up with a cup of tea delivered to her bedside, I whisper sweet nothings in her sleeping ear.  "Mommy loves you my Angel Darling" I say.  Because, when those baby blues open - all bets are off!

Then there is the Love Puppy, my seven year old jumping bean!  He was up at 5am this morning, all dressed in his new school uniform.  The reason? "We are making sandwiches at school, Mommy!"  Such excitement!  I wonder if I can con him into making the sandwiches every morning!  Probably not, I will have to pay him, like I pay him to empty the dishwasher.  The current rate is R5 a load.

Finally there is me.  40 year old (okay 39) MILF wannabe with the bright blue finger nails.  Multitasking every second of the day.  Every second?  Yes, I grind my teeth when I sleep, I'm THAT dedicated to a stressful life!

So I will check back here every so often to share some of my stuff.  Have an awesome weekend.  Its Friday!  Only two days left till Monday!